Last day at Colonel Roy's

Last night we walked out at sunset past a really big mango tree with fruits the size of  rugby balls, and to our surprise there were half a dozen fruit bats, called flying foxes around three feet wide darting between the trees.

 We called at the Opticians to order some new specs for himself, very reasonable at £29 for titanium frames and good lenses.  Himself asked how long they would take to make them up  and he was told 15 minutes !  Service or what?  

We went for dinner on the rooftop of a local hotel, and were welcomed in by a very smart concierge complete with white suit and turban.Hells bells, I've just realised you can see right through my latest purchase!

  There was a buffet of about 40 dishes, 10 starters, and far too many sweets and I think himself tried all of it!!  We left after eating far too much and spending just a tenner.

Today has been a very slutty day, we went to the Indian Coffee house for elevenses.  Its in all the guide books so we thought we had better take a look.  It’s the Indian version of the leaning tower of Pisa.  The waiters walk all the way around the central core up to the top of the slopes, the tables are set off at the side & numbered.  We sat at table 27 almost at the top.  I can just see management of an English establishment trying to get waiters to run up a gradient like that all day, health & safety would have a fit! We had a white coffee and lemon tea for just 18p and I got a rollicking from himself for not leaving a tip!  

Outside & inside the Indian Coffee Shop

Next door to the Indian Coffee house is the new bus station, talk about state of the art, it’s a stunning building,  built in next to no time, we cant even build a bridge over our river in 6 months!

Our digs are by the Home office, and the Minister of State came on a visit yesterday at break neck speed, he was wedged between three police cars and following in hot pursuit was an ambulance, all the local police saluted him.

This afternoon we went to the coast to Kovalum to get some cooler air and our driver asked if we needed the air con on at an extra  1 rupee a kilometre – we said what the hell, switch it on!  The beaches were busy, India goes to the seaside on Sundays.  There were some really big waves hitting the shore and two lifeguards were on patrol with red flags and whistles blowing frantically to warn people to keep to shallow water.   Indians don’t swim!  Most can’t, all the women go in fully dressed in their saris and the men strip down to their budgie smugglers.  Its quite a sight.  One group of rowdy youngsters were red flagged, dragged out and made to have time out sitting on the edge of the beach in disgrace for ten minutes before being allowed back in.  They  whooped for joy and somersaulted into the warm clear waters only to be whistled and flagged again!

Us and 2000 Indians shared the beach, however we started negotiations on renting two sunbeds and a brolly, and after several minutes joked we didn’t want to take the stuff home with us, the vendor laughed and said he would throw in a couple   of dogs as well.  We spent an entertaining afternoon there and had supper at sunset at a beachfront restaurant, eating a huge Red Snapper washed down with illicit beer and gin and tonics, again served in mugs and cans and bottles hidden under the table

We have been listening to some very loud noises in the night and asked Roy our host what it was.  It sounded like cannon fire, it was in fact coconuts and jackfruits dropping some 70 feet on to the roof of the house!

We move on to Bengaluru (Bangalore) tomorrow, so might not get to do the blog.  We’ll be back soon ………………

PS Happy Birthday Jack xxxxxxxxxx Hope you get the drum kit!

Embarrassment, emporiums and elephants

Kerela is a lush, tropical, fertile province, they call it the garden of India.  It’s also reasonably affluent.  You don’t see beggars, rubbish, or straying cattle and dogs.  The people are well off by Indian standards and there is almost nil unemployment.  Cars are new Tata hatchbacks and Hyundai coupes. 

Our host Roy was telling us about some Americans who arrived shortly before us.  They had bought with them a huge suitcase full of unwanted clothes because they had heard that Indian people were poor, hungry and had no clothes.  He said he was in the embarrassing situation of having to tell them that they had got it wrong.  He could not think of anyone who would ever want second hand clothes especially enormous sizes from America.  He took them to an orphanage who flatly refused  them, and he was forced to lug the big case back and burn the contents! Roy also told us a riddle last night and asked us if we could work out the answer.  It kept four of us awake all night and then we had to drag the answer out of him.  You lot are next!

 We have  met a couple of really nice Australian guys who are very well travelled.  They frequently come to India and China to buy goods for their shop and go home via  Male & Kuala Lumpur.  Roger was saying that he was about to give a beggar  sitting outside a market in one of the northern states some money, when the beggar pulled out his Samsung Galaxy he changed his mind!

We had a restless night, apart from the riddle,  and an early start, the church next door started Mass at 6am and it went on til 7.30. 

Note to self: must remember to look on Google Earth to see what's next door, the Mosque is up the top of the road too and R.C. Cathedral opposite it.   The Bells the bells!

 Around 7am the “loggers” came to cut a tree down, so the damn chainsaw started up, the dogs started and the bells were ringing again,  We decided to take it easy today with just some essential shopping, conditioner (Pantene 75p) colgate toothpast 65p, two Revlon nailpolishes £1.30 and some camera batteries we usually pay about £8 back home were 45p!!!! We have a bag full, don’t know where we are going to put it all to get it back to Goa!  We already have a third case sitting in the taxi drivers home in Goa that he is going to bring to us when we get there in about a weeks time.

I also bought 3 long floaty tunic type tops that are so cool.  I  have to keep out of the sun after major skin problems last year, so the new clothes are ideal.  The heat here has been unbearable around mid day today it was 35c in the shade, last night we commented on how cool it had gone, it was 29c!.  Whilst out shopping I inadvertently left my handbag in one of the shops.  I didn't realise I hadn't got it until about an hour later!!!! I dashed back to where I had tried on all my tunics and the boy had kept it under the counter for me.  I was so relieved, it had my purse, credit & bank cards and iphone in it. I gave him some cash as a thank you

 We popped into an emporium and bought some nice silk wall hangings for home and then lunch at the Trivandrum Hotel.

We've been to see elephants and lions and hippos 

but as they are in controlled spaces, its no better than in a safari park. The last two photos are at the Botanical gardens, but it was so hot we abandoned it for a long cool beer, served to us in coffee mugs and out of a tea pot!

Lush, prosperous Kerela

We had two good flights down to Kerela from Port Blair.  At both check in desks we were asked if we had any seat preferences, to which himself said, yes please, first if poss, otherwise extra leg room seats, and we got them.  We had meals on both flights,  Chicken Korma, Wild rice & dhal with a chapatti and coffee gateau on the one.  We were a bit close with the flight timings and when we explained it to the Air India staff they sent us a buggy to take us from one terminal to the other.  What brilliant service, and on an infrastructure note, both Chennai and Trivandrum airports make Birmingham & Manchester look like third world airports! 

The picture above is of richest temple in India.  Shri Padnanabhaswany Temple is 260 years old and in the cellars was found 8 vaults full of gold bullion.  Only one has been audited and was found to contain £11billion  worth of gold. This was accumulated by the King being weighed every year and his weight being deposited in gold. Now same thing is done - but in bananas!

We are staying with Colonel Roy at the Varikatt Heritage Homestay, which is just wonderful.  Huge airy bedroom and sitting room , a super king size bed with springy mattress!!!!, and yes hot water in a big wet room.  Roy greeted us with a big smile and coldbeer.  Dinner was cooked by his wife and was delicious.

Thursday

After a very relaxing excellent nights sleep, we had a quick look at a Hindu temple which is the richest in India, and also the Maharajas Palace Museum which was just amazing.  Sorry no pics, the Indians tried to take some and had their camera confiscated! 

We met three Canadians who are staying, one of whom is a chef.  Jay and himself have spent hours talking recipes, cookery programmes etc etc., yawn.  On that note, we decided to go to the market with Roy this morning to see unusual fruits and fish.  It was quite an eye opener, the fish was super fresh and we’re having some for dinner tonight.  Roy showed us the Mutton Shop – well, himself said “do they slaughter overnight and bring it in the morning?” Roy said that if you look to the left the goats are tied up ready for when they need more meat! Don’t come much fresher than that!

We saw 20 different types of bananas, 10 assorted varieties of rice, fruit and veg we have never seen and cant pronounce the names of.  The cost of the fish in the market was very cheap a kg of King prawns was £2 and ordinary prawns £1 a kg.  Himself bought another load of spices, the cases are getting heavier and heavier and weve been over our baggage allowance on every flight, but never been charged- yet!

 Himself and I are amazed by the friendliness of the Indian people.   We are often stopped in the street by strangers, who shake hands and say where are you from?  School children are always chatty, we met some yesterday at the Botanical Gardens and all of them wanted to talk to practice their English, in no time we were surrounded by dozens of happy Indian children.

Friday

Day off today, we went to the beach after saying goodbye to our Canadian chums who were on route to Thailand and Cambodia.  

Flashback to Andamans

The fast-cat ferry from Port Blair to Haverlock Island, 208 Indians and just us two.

Amazing Fish on the menu:-

Red Snapper

Burma Mangrove Jack Fish

Coral Trout,

Travelli

Butterfish

Yellowfin Tuna,

Great Barracuda

Silver Spot Snapper

Indo Pacific King Mackerel

Tiger Prawns

Lobster

Sunset on Beach no 7

The beach in front of our digs

Five days in paradise

 Well this was home for five days, our bamboo lodge at Emerald Gecko, Haverlock Island in the Andamans.

The awful picture below is the view from the upstairs terrace!

Its taken 40 minutes to upload these two so will do more when we get to Trivandrum on Wednesday

The Beautiful Andaman Islands

Monday – date unknown- lost track of time!

Its 7am in the morning and we’re sitting on our bamboo terrace overlooking the swaying coconut palms and the calm blue sea.  The smoker (aka the water boiler) has just been lit with the usual paraffin and health and safety issues have been  addressed , light a match and run!  Himself and I are taking bets on who will be first out with the bucket, my money’s on the Germans, Himself reckons the Japs, there are several of them who form an orderly line and swish it to the end where a tiny little girl struggles about 100 yards with it.

Our rickshaw driver Ammet took us to another beautiful beach yesterday, the contrast of the colours in the water is stunning. The sea is full of tropical fish and it really is like swimming in an aquarium.  Sadly we no longer scuba dive, but snorkelling is good enough.

We went out to Fat Martins for lunch (Masalla dosa) and himself had a dessert of a honey, banana & fresh coconut  all for 2.60.  In the evening we went to the Tandoori barbeque on the beach. Himself as usual,  had a chat with the chef who had worked in Newquay in the ‘80’s who told us tonights special was Roast Lamb with mint sauce, new potatoes , French beans and carrots.  I thought I’d died and gone to heaven!  The chef did insist we tried the Tandoori Chicken kebabs for starters and they nearly blew our socks off – another immense chilli rush.  We asked chef for some yoghourt to tone down the chilli and he nipped off on his Royal Enfield to get some for us.   When our mains arrived chef has slipped a couple of cheeky lamb chops on the side – delicious.

We have been given a hammock and todays challenge is for himself to find a couple of suitable trees to tie it to on a nice deserted beach.

A little penning from himself, after a super king prawn and fresh coconut curry and a very tasty grilled tuna steak (cost £5) Ammet our favourite trainee formula one rickshaw driver came to pick us up to go and see the sunset at Radha Nagar beach which is supposed to be one of the best in  India, ( if you have chance look it up on the net) well it lived up to our expectations we got some great photos which I will upload (if poss) sometime next week. The only way to describe it is like a great big orange ball sinking in to the sea, I think me and herself were the only white faces amongst around 200 people gathered to see a fantastic the sunset.

The beach itself is truly amazing, pure white sand which stretches for a couple of miles and the sea is just like getting into a warm bath, long time since we have had hot water!

On returning to the hotel I wandered over to the reception to settle our account, and at the front desk was the normal selection of nationalities all looking at a bath towel which one of the Germans had got. It had been torn in several places the Germans asked the manager what could have done it, he swerved the question saying that we are living in the jungle and could not be sure at which point the French said whatever it was  it would probably taste nice with some garlic butter, the Japanese had not got time to comment as the hot water boiler had just been lit and they needed to get on the water chain. I pointed out that I thought it was what we call in England a long tail AKA rat!. The manager agreed and put his vermin policy into action. We have three very friendly dogs that live at the hotel and we reckon they have trained them to see off any Indians and hippies  that try to come on to the property. Any way he got one of the dogs and sat him on guard outside the Germans hut ready to go on a rat catching mission, who needs all this fancy equipment when you have a feisty rat catching dog!, we can all now sleep easy as woof 1 is on the case.

We hope to try to upload some pics when we get back to the mainland in about 3 days time.  We leave Haverlock Island for Port Blair on Tuesday and fly from Port Blair to Chennai, then Chennai to Trivandrum in Kerela on Wednesday, but don’t arrive until late so it maybe Thursday before we get in touch again.

Bye for now - its not still raining is it !

The Andamans - Robinson Crusoe Land

Hello again, we’re back! There is very little internet  on  the islands and phones don’t work well either, so its been a  really relaxing time!

We arrived from Chennai to Port Blair in the Andaman Islands and Jet Konect were efficient, early and with a spanking new 737.  We had a meal on board ,breads and  a spicy lentil dish, with coffee gateaux.  Himself  oinked someone out of his seat as he requested the window, then after ½ an hour of chatting to the elderly Indian gent and his wife, we found out it was the first time they  had been on a plane after working for the government for 60 years!  She seemed very disappointed, so we all swapped seats, which was the gentlemanly thing to do.  Himself told the old guy that we had to lean to the right when the plane banked he seemed a bit confused, then himself said “only kidding”

Our first night in Port Blair was at the Captains House, and we were greeted by Dinaz and welcomed into her home.   Our room was large and airy with an ensuite and sitting room, so we thought we had done quite well. The view from her roof terrace over Port Blair was stunning.  She cooked dinner for us and an Irish couple who were on their way home.  We retired early to find the bed was infinitely harder than a park bench.  The night was very eventful.

 Himself made a note of the following events:-

10.30 baby next door started crying

12.00 baby stopped whinging

4.15  Islamic call to prayer from local mosque

4.20  Dogs started howling with the wailing, obviously Muslim dogs

This in turn woke up the cockerels who joined in

Then the birds started the  damn dawn chorus

Dogs then started barking

Cats started meowing and a big fight broke out

This in turn started the crows off.

We gave up on sleep at  about 5am it was bedlam.  Note to self ; must find somewhere else for on the way back!

We departed Port Blair with 208 Indians and me and himself, on a huge hight powered “Super-fast” catamaran that sped between the islands.   The Indians  were all ho, ho, ho til  we got to open water ,then probably 50 % turned green.   Himself and I are both good sailors so no problem for us.  On arrival at Haverlock Island we had an autorickshaw which took us to the Emerald Gecko.  If  I tell you its like Robinson Crusoe Island, with aquamarine sea, cloudless skies, white sandy beaches it would not be a lie. Sunsets and sunrises to die for.

Our accommodation is a bamboo  split level beach house not 15 feet from the sea.  We have a  sitting room, upstairs terrace and bedroom with a ceiling fan, outside bathroom and shower.  The air conditioning  is by means of raising the rattan blinds and letting in cool sea air. We are in house no 6, and there is an airy restaurant called  Blackbeard’s bistro who serve fish I have never heard of, but is delicious.  All the rest of the properties have no bathroom and use communal showers and  the “squatters”.   There is only hot water from a big boiler which is heated by a fire underneath at 8am and 7pm.This makes fascinating viewing, the boys trying to light the fire from driftwood and I think a slosh of paraffin causing much hilarity and jumping about!  We have noticed that:

Brits don’t bother , just showering with the cold stuff,

French go in their underpants to the communal block buckets in hand

Germans get there early and nick all the hot,

Americans check out!

A Japanese contingent arrived last night, obviously staying in one of the huts and duly formed a line with their buckets (5 gallon variety) to do there ablutions. 

The Andamans only have 3 bars all of which sell out quick!  This has caused a minor panic in the Herself and Himself household. The wine shop, just the one on the island, is open spasmodically causing mayhem.  Himself went by autorickshaw on three occasions only to find it shut or sold out.  Today he went at 8.30 a bit of a struggle but a successful mission.  Just in case, he bought a couple of bottles of Gin (£2) and beer, which we haven’t seen for last 3 days. There is a big fridge in the Bistro for guest use which says STRICTLY NO ALCOHOL and it is absolutely full of wines, spirits and beer!

Sorry  there are no pictures but the internet cannot cope with them, but we will store them up for late
PS Hello to all our family and friends, we're still spending the inheritance xxxxx